I sorely miss our Abbey cat who we lost 4 years ago today. She was something special this one and there will always be a hole in our home where she really should always still be.
Work In Progress
June 15, 2013 by Leave a Comment
Writing hiatus is over and I am back to work on the novel I started last November for NaNoWriMo. I read what I have written and am very pleased with it. There are gaps to be filled but I have scenes scoped out, ideas logged, photos that inspire. Feeling revitalized – I’ll finish this thing yet.
Ancestry vs Religion
June 10, 2013 by Leave a Comment
I saw an ad for DNA testing today where someone discovered they were Jewish. Since when is religion hard coded in to DNA? I am aware that at least in the US our Supreme Court uses Jewish as a quasi-race classification but this is clearly incorrect. Ancestry has no physical bearing on religious choice nor does a religious choice affect ones ancestry. Perhaps we need to come up with new words to differentiate between ancestral and spiritual definitions.
pockets of wishes
June 9, 2013 by Leave a Comment
“There is no terminus, only suitcases out of which the same old self unfolds like a suit, bold and shiny with pockets of wishes.”
Sylvia Plath
Emerging
June 9, 2013 by 4 Comments
About two years ago I started therapy to address some things that happened to me a long time ago. Things I never acknowledged, not repressed, but just shelved and filed away.
More about that can be found here and here.
Acknowledging depression is difficult. There is still stigma, shame, weakened pride. It’s such a nebulous term filled with stereotypes and misperception but it is real, people experience it, I experience it.
It’s not been easy and I am far from finished with my work, but through my efforts and the support I do receive, I can see myself emerging. Analogies abound – sun rising after a long darkness, awakening from a hibernation, restarting an old machine after it’s been long dormant.
There is a bit of truth to all of them for as I emerge from a depression, it is like all of those things.
The sun is rising and while it feels good on my skin, it also blinds my eyes with it’s light, light I am not used to seeing or experiencing. I am just as likely to run towards it as I am to flee.
Out of hibernation, my steps are still tenuous but my needs are great. I need to balance them, don’t come out of the cave too quickly as I’m still so vulnerable. I am just as likely to retreat back in as I am to move to the entrance.
A dormant machine restarted will likely hiss and growl and choke. It will miss a few beats and may even shut itself down again before eventually clearing out the kinks and falling back in to a rhythm. I am just as likely to refuse to run as I am to hum along productively.
Each day is a struggle and I don’t really ever see that fully disappearing. But I hope that I am learning to cope, to manage the overwhelming barrage, to filter and to reframe. It is odd to feel even vaguely optimistic as that has been a foreign feeling for me, but I want it to be real, and I think that maybe if I build it, it will come.
So here I am, emerging. Writing a bit more. Doing a bit more. Day by day. Emerging.
On RSS and Essential Blogs
June 8, 2013 by Leave a Comment
In the last 1/2 year or so I have severely neglected my blog reading (as well as blog writing…) but over the last few days I’ve started using a new reader (ReadKit for Mac) and am plowing through back articles. I’m zipping through thousands of items but I find that there are a few blogs that make me pause and read further. If you’ve been here a while it’s no surprise which sites grab my attention – my big three:
Execupundit – Michael Wade on Leadership, Ethics, Management, and Life. If you could only choose one blog to read, this is the one.
Cultural Offering – Kurt’s views on everything imaginable – it’s insightful, amusing, and musical.
Eclecticity – The most diverse collection of – things – you’ll find anywhere. A tremendous source of shareable items and conversation starters.
Yes there are others, but year after year after year these are the folks who do this blogging thing best.
always trying to…
June 3, 2013 by Leave a Comment
Will he take a sailboat ride?
He is very likely to,
Will he feel good inside?
He ain’t ever likely to,
Will he tell you he’s alive?
He is always trying to…
Supertramp – “Asylum”
Zen and Mac
May 31, 2013 by Leave a Comment
It’s been a while since I launched a new web site but this is one I’ve been thinking about for over a year and finally took the time to put it together. Zen and Mac is designed to help Mac users do cool and productive things with their Mac. I’m really excited about it and hope folks find it useful.
Bleeding
May 29, 2013 by Leave a Comment
Today was time for my regularly scheduled bloodletting. Every sixteen weeks I donate a batch of double red through aphresis. Apparently the double red is desirable as they can give more of the same blood to a single donor which is easier for them to receive than mixed from different donors.
It takes about 45 minutes to do and is really an amazing process because of the way they reintroduce the blood back in once they remove the red cells. It’s not painful at all, other than my needing to watch day time television during the process, today was The Talk and Judge Judy.
