Trading Faces

I have to admit I am a bit disappointed in the Internets and all of it's inhabitants today. In a time when information exchange is supposed to be at it's highest, somehow I was never notified that the movie Face/Off was in fact the worst movie ever made.

I mean I assumed from the trailers and such from way back that it was going to be a litle farfetched, but it never occurred to me that it could be this bad. Really bad and just entirely too silly and ridiculous, even for a movie that has at it's basic premise two people trading faces. How on earth did they get John Travolta and Nicolas Cage into this dump - oh wait, never mind.

But really, this was just astonishlingly bad. Filled with every cliche you can imagine, the most ridiculous boat chase I have ever seen, and the utterly unbelievable we'll just adopt the kid from the guy I killed who had previously killed our kid.

The concept of them having traded places and the utter helplessness of Archer (as Troy) when sitting in jail could have been fascinating. As a psychological drama it could have been interesting. As an action thriller it was just a waste of 2 hours.

I give it an empty thermos that had just a bit of coffee at the bottom at one time but now it's old and moldy and you could clean it but it's easier to just throw it away.

I think I need to work on my rating system.

Cheers!
SB

Comments

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Your review was far more entertaining than the movie itself!

I'm glad I was busy puttering around the house and not compelled to be in the same room with the TV continuously for the duration of the movie. In this case at least, thank god for chores!

#1 gina (Homepage) on 2008-03-17 14:08 (Reply)

LOL, it was a pretty bad movie! I like the thermos rating, though. It befits your blog.

#2 nat (Homepage) on 2008-03-17 17:03 (Reply)

Yeah, I thought it was bad too. Sort of like "CSI Miami" kind of bad. Laughably bad. Local English TV station seems to love showing it though.

#3 Lis (Homepage) on 2008-03-18 06:14 (Reply)

what really made NO SENSE was the fact that millions went to see this crap at the movie theater!!

if it does come up on cable, turn it on just to laugh at John Woo's signature slow motion sequences and the inexplicable appearances of white doves. heh.

#4 retroDan (Homepage) on 2008-03-18 08:09 (Reply)

Gina - yes, you were lucky indeed. That is why I didn't help you with the chores, I was sparing you from the same pain I was experiencing...

Nat - cool, one vote for the moldy thermos rating system.

Lis - I did laugh out loud a couple of times now that I think about it. As for CSI Miami, Monday night CBS is the best night of comedy on TV.

Dan - yeah the scene in the church combined them both if I recall. Like Lis said, it was good for a laugh so perhaps not a complete waste of time.

Thanks for comments all,
SB

#5 Scott (Homepage) on 2008-03-18 09:09 (Reply)

First, you never heard it on the internet as being the worst movie ever, because it is only one of the worst movies ever. The worst is a coin toss between dicky roberts and lost in space.

#6 pilotg2 (Homepage) on 2008-03-18 18:18 (Reply)

I love the "empty thermos" award. Although I don't remember when we watched it (rental from Blockbuster lots of years ago...) I don't remember thinking it was horrible. Of course, I don't remember much about it, either. Maybe I was up and about in the house while it was on like Gina was. I do like both the actors, though, so am forgiving in that regard. Hahahaha!

#7 kellypea (Homepage) on 2008-03-18 20:05 (Reply)

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